Hard Times but Finally a Light at the End of the Tunnel

It's hard to describe the feeling of seeing a loved one in pain.  Or to describe the smell of a household engulfed in death.  I would describe the 24 hours I spent in Indiana with my aunt and family as rivaling 24 hours in the hospital with my father when he was in a coma and we were not sure if he was going to wake up.  The hospital ended badly and my dad did not wake up.  Fortunately, the situation with my aunt is looking up (at least temporarily).  She is in a rehab hospital now to help recover from the strokes.  I just hope it gets her back into the present.  She tends to jump back 30 years, and it seems as though she is checking in with us using her memories.  It's as though she's trying to confirm that her memories actually happened.  It's heartbreaking to think about what her life is like and was like when she was living with her daughter and suffering unspeakable abuse.

My trip only lasted 24 hours but left lasting impressions.  It wasn't until yesterday that I was able to function as a normal human being and until today that I actually felt like myself again.  I don't get depressed very often (generally, I'm quite perky!) but I was in a dark place.  I felt abandoned by friends and just felt like no one understood.  I had one friend tell me to "have a good weekend!" even though they knew what was going down.  Now, I'm not one to hold grudges or get mad at friends but, come on, people!  Some rules of thumb in case you ever have a friend going through a hard time:

1) Yes, they may not want to talk about it, but try anyway or at least check in.  Although the person may rebuff your attempts, they will remember you trying.
2) Never respond to any exchange with exclamation points.  It at least makes me feel like you don't care and/or have no empathy.
3) Flowers are fabulous.  I wouldn't normally put this but my good friend (and bmaid) Jess sent me a bouquet and it totally made all the difference.  It really did.  I truly truly appreciated it.

K, enough with the lecture.  But really.  I've had a hard few days and it made me think of who my closest friends are.  You know who you are, and I truly appreciate everything.  It's not necessarily over but I know you will be there.

As a light at the end of the tunnel, I'm hosting a "Healthy Recipe Exchange & Potluck+Ladies Night" tomorrow evening.  This has been in the works for weeks.  I almost canceled because of the above but decided it would be best to go forward with it.  I'm happy I didn't cancel.  It seems like the girls are excited and that in turn makes me excited.  I've asked a friend to bring a camera (E took mine with him on his trip) so hopefully, I'll be able to make a blog post and have all the health recipes to share with all of you.