Living Long Distance

I've been asked to write a post about living long distance and some general advice for those that might be living long distance at some point.  I'll tell you the honest-to-goodness truth.  It did not get really hard until about 8 months ago.  Erik and I have always been very independent people -- we rarely went out together with our friends preferring the company of our own groups of friends without the other there.  That's not to say that we didn't enjoy spending time together.  We just didn't do it that often since we were both in grad school.  Most of the time, we would say we were going to watch tv and then we would end up just drinking wine and talking.

The days that it's the hardest are Sunday nights or Monday mornings after a visit.  Once you live with someone, you get used to them being there.  I still sleep much better when E is around for a sleepover.  Whenever I leave Cambridge or Erik leaves NYC, I feel empty and the emptiness lingers for a few days.  Most of the time, that goes away and I settle into my routine.  I find hobbies (much like this blog and my getting fit goal) help to pass the hours at night at home alone.  I find myself wishing for work to be really busy because those are the times that it's not that hard.

I've found things to do on the weekends when we are not visiting -- hence, my scavenger hunt posts to pass the time and not let this opportunity of living in NYC pass me by.

My post a little while ago was mostly about my work stresses.  I hit an inflection point for sure when I realized that this is just not worth it.  But that wasn't about the distance.  That was about the job.  I'll write more on that at a later time.

So, my advice for this time around: Find something to do in your downtime that's adventurous or creative and that does not just consist of watching tv.  It's hard at first (there were definitely lots of lonely nights and days during the weekend when I wandered aimlessly around the city), but it's totally worth it.  I've found that it makes things easier for me to know that I have stuff I want to accomplish on the weekend.

As I think of some additional advice, I'll make sure to post it.  In the meantime, consider investing in an iPhone 4.  FaceTime has been awesome and let's me see my kitties (and whether Erik is keeping the apartment clean!).